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'A beautiful read' Danny Dyer 'Neil's book has given me a new-found appreciation of how he used the "Razor" alter ego to mask what he was going through . . . the turnaround in him is a revelation' Alan Shearer 'Razor' was Neil Ruddock's caricature of the larger-than-life football hardman, a persona which become a comfort blanket to smother every mood, every emotion. When his front door closed, the laughter stopped. With his trademark humour and brutal honesty, Ruddock recounts how he spiralled so far out of control that he lost sight of who he really was. No matter how he was feeling, he reached for the same old answer -the mask of 'Razor' and a big night out. Toxic is Ruddock's candid and inspiring memoir charting his journey of self-destruction through to pressing the reset button after his dangerous addiction's took him to the brink of death. This is the moving story of the battle of Ruddock's life: to find the strength to free himself from the shackles of the person he thought he needed to be, and become the man he always knew he was. 'A courageous and fascinating autobiography' Robbie Fowler 'Toxic has given me a more rounded picture of Neil. To have the strength and determination to transform his life is a special thing' Robbie Williams

Neil 'Razor' Ruddock tells the inspiring and uplifting story of how he faced the battle of his life: to become a different person.

Toxic

Tackling 'Razor' and Finding the Real Me

'I'm half the man I used to be, but twice the man I used to be.' Neil 'Razor' Ruddock tells the inspiring and uplifting story of how he faced the battle of his life: to become a different person.

'Neil's book has given me a new-found appreciation of how he used the "Razor" alter ego to mask what he was going through. The recent turnaround in him, both physical and mental, is a revelation.' ALAN SHEARER 'Love Neil Ruddock. One of the old school. He's honest and funny as f**k. A beautiful read and a strong bit of memoir. Well done son.' DANNY DYER 'You think you know "Razor" Ruddock? Well, think again. This is a courageous and fascinating autobiography by my ex-teammate, a book which will inspire so many others to confront their past and change their life.' ROBBIE FOWLER 'Neil has always been the life and soul of the party but I can't tell you how much Toxic has given me a more rounded picture of him. To have the strength and determination to transform his life is a special thing.' ROBBIE WILLIAMS 'Neil's book blew my mind. Now I understand my friend's journey to finally being comfortable in his own skin.' IAN WRIGHT Neil 'Razor' Ruddock tells the inspiring and uplifting story of how he faced the battle of his life: to become a different person. In this inspiring and uplifting memoir, Neil Ruddock charts his toxic journey of self-destruction, a path littered with food addiction, plummeting self-confidence and a dangerous relationship with drink which took him to the brink of death. 'Razor' was his caricature of the larger-than-life football hardman, a persona which turned from a natural extension of Ruddock's character to a comfort blanket to smother every mood, every emotion. When his front door closed, the laughter stopped. He was depressed and despairing. Football had institutionalised him. Talking about his inner feelings wasn't an option, owning up to mental health issues was an absolute no-no. In a remarkable series of confessions, and with his trademark humour and brutal honesty, Ruddock recounts how he spiralled so far out of control that he lost sight of who he really was. No matter how he was feeling, he reached for the same old answer - the mask of 'Razor' and a big night out. Following the fitting of a pacemaker and drastic stomach surgery, Ruddock has lost nine stones, firmly pressed the reset button on his life, and found the strength to free himself of the shackles of the bloke he thought he needed to be in order to become the man he always knew he was. Toxic tells the story of how Ruddock faced the battle of his life: to become a different person. No longer does he feel the need to be anything but his true self. As he now says: I'm half the man I used to be, but twice the man I used to be.'

The two things Razor Ruddock can't resist in life are a pint and a dare. That and seventeen years as a professional footballer under his belt means he's got a story or two to tell. Chickening out of a fight with Eric Cantona, robbing Alan Shearer's minibar, cinema trips with Gazza, becoming mates with Ian Wright - Razor has seen and done it all. Packed full of hilarious anecdotes, Razor gives us his take on the beautiful game, sharing his tactics (good banter is a defender's duty), red mist (and red cards) on the pitch, run-ins with the FA, as well as his best ever goal and the greatest night of his sporting life. Razor also lifts the lid on his bad reputation and reveals his regrets, his heroes and what it takes to make Britain's hardest footballer cry. Poignantly, he shares his views on the importance of family and his concerns over footballers' mental health. And the biggest surprise of all: that he was a shy and retiring young lad (and that his love of swearing comes from his mum). Cameo appearances include: Bobby Robson, Diego Maradona, Eric Cantona, Dennis Bergkamp, Harry Redknapp, David Beckham, Alan Shearer, Gazza, Jimmy Case, Phil 'The Power' Taylor, Robbie Williams and Nelson Mandela ('Nelse'). With his trademark sense of humour and foot-in-mouth disease, The World According to Razor is like having a pint down the pub with Razor himself.

With his trademark sense of humour and foot-in-mouth disease, The World According to Razor is like having a pint down the pub with Razor himself.

The World According to Razor

My Closest Shaves